Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (2024)

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (1)

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Does no contact work on men? People employ the no-contact rule for different reasons, including to get rid of their ex or to get their attention. Regardless of the result, one thing is sure – the no-contact male psychology works most of the time.

But the question is, why do men come back after no contact? What is the no-contact male psychology? What goes on in the male mind after no contact? Learn the answers to these questions in the following paragraphs.

What is the no contact rule?

The “no contact rule” is like pressing pause on your relationship. It means you stop reaching out to your ex or someone you need space from. It’s a way to give both of you time to heal, reflect, and decide what you want.

Think of it as a breather for your heart. The idea is to take a break from each other to clear your thoughts, heal, and figure out where you want things to go. It’s like giving your emotions some space to breathe and regroup before deciding what’s next.

Read more about the no contact rule here.

Does no contact make him come back to you?

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (3)
Using the no-contact male psychology means cutting off all means of communication with a man to either end the relationship, get his attention, or make him miss you. That means no calls, no emails, no texts, no emails, no DMs, or constant checking on social media.

Many people want to know whether no contact works on men. Do men always come back after no contact from their partner? To begin with, when you use the no-contact rule on your ex or partner, you snatch the freedom to communicate with them.

The mind, after no contact, becomes occupied and buzzing. He wonders what happened, reaches out, and demands what’s wrong. He might feel unworthy or inadequate. When you refuse to talk to him, it further pushes them to pursue you.

Some things your ex might do to get the freedom of talking to you include asking about you from your mutual friends, talking to your friends and family members, or getting angry at you.

Men respond to no contact because of the curiosity present in every human. This curiosity pushes your partner to return so he can know why you behaved as you did. For instance, when someone suddenly stops speaking to you, it’s expected that you find out why they act that way.

Imagine someone you usually communicate with constantly – you know about their routine, activities, and plans. All of a sudden, you aren’t privy to such information. That may drive your partner to come back to you after ghosting him.

Why do men come back after no contact? No contact rule works on men if you improve yourself during that time. Indeed, the intention might be to get rid of your ex or make them miss you.

But it is best to focus on being a better version of yourself. Find new hobbies, wear good clothes, and look good.

What goes through a man’s mind during the no-contact phase is likely a lot. A man you have ghosted may be more than curious to come back. So, some people ask, “Does he think about me during no contact? Yes, he does.

Even if you might not come back together, he may feel it’s essential to get your attention. Therefore, men respond to no contact.

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (4)

What to do if he comes back after no contact?

Indeed, the no-contact rule works for men. But you must know what to do when he comes back after no contact. Meanwhile, what you do when your ex comes back depends on your intention.

For example, if you implement the no-contact rule to make your ex miss you, you can give room for discussion.

Similarly, if you want to get rid of your ex, it’s best to give some explanation for your actions. While you have achieved your aim of making him come back, the mature thing to do is to have a conversation.

Let them know how you feel and their offense. Give them the chance to explain and understand from their perspective.

Understand that the no-contact male psychology works because men can also be emotional like the female gender. They crave intimacy and connection, even when they act strong.

So, when you employ the no-contact rule, they seek all possible means to get back to you. That’s why some people say, “he came back after no contact.”

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23 reasons why men come back after no contact

After months of no contact, your ex suddenly drops a message on WhatsApp asking that you meet or says he misses you and needs to talk. Why? What goes through a guy’s mind during no contact, and why do men come back after no contact?

The following are some likely reasons why men return after you’ve been apart:

1. He misses you

Do men always come back after you ghost them? Yes, they can. The male mind during no contact can divert them to feel your absence more strongly.

People find their way back to their ex if they realize how much they miss her. This may happen if you spend a lot of time together during your dating phase. Also, if he keeps seeing something that reminds him of you, it may be hard to let go.

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2. He can’t find someone like you

Why do men come back? One reason is that they can’t find someone like their ex-lover.

While there are thousands of people better than you, there might always be one unique trait you have. If he cherishes this behavior and can’t see it in other people, he can come crawling back to you in no time.

3. He is guilty

Another reason men respond to no contact is if they feel guilty.

The mind, during no contact, can work like a machine. He may begin to think about all the times he did something wrong and was never caught. Now that you use the no communication rule, he might think you knew about the offense.

4. He feels lonely

The no-contact rule works on men if they feel lonely. Loneliness can make you do many things, including reconnecting with your ex. It doesn’t even matter if you are the one at fault or they are. What matters is that you see them.

5. His plan didn’t work out after all

After the breakup, your ex probably thinks many people may come running to him, or he may be free. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work this way. He might know that no one is perfect when reality dawns on him. Therefore, the following action is to go back to you.

6. He was just in a bad relationship

Why do men come back after no contact? One common reason men return is that they have dated another person and discovered what they lost. The saying goes, “We don’t appreciate what we have until it’s lost.”

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (5)

For instance, your ex might complain about your expressive nature only to meet someone who hardly communicates. In this case, he might pray to have you back in no time.

7. Friends and family keep asking about you

The no-contact rule works on men if their family and friends don’t stop asking about their ex. This is usually the case if you and your ex have been dating for a long time.

Regardless of why you broke up, friends and families may never cease to make you understand what a big mistake he made. As such, he may be forced to reach out to you.

8. He’s now a better man

Why do men come back? He may come back after no contact because he has improved. The fight you had was probably about some of his behavior. The breakup was the opportunity he needed to work on himself.

After no contact here, the man’s mind may have worked tirelessly to figure out how to improve. Now that he’s better, he’s back to satisfy you. It’s left to you to accept or reject him.

9. He wants to hook up

Why do men come back? Sometimes, some men return to your life only to have sex with you. It is unfortunate, but it’s some people’s reality. But then, how do you know if someone genuinely wants to come back or hook up?

If he drunk texts you around 2 am asking you to go to a club or sends flirty messages, know that he wants to hook up.

Research shows that drunk texting is a way of emotional dysregulation, so you can see an inclination to come when he does this.

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10. The reality of the breakup hasn’t set in

If your ex is confused about the breakup, it won’t be long before he comes begging for your attention. You probably broke up messily, or he believes there is not enough reason for you to end it.

Either way, a guy may come back after the no-contact rule to understand what happened.

11. He notices you’ve changed

You have counted your losses after the breakup and moved on. You have improved yourself greatly, focused on your goals, and glowing more as an intelligent person. Whatever changes happen in your life, he can see that you are in better shape. It’s only normal that he tries to come back.

Learn how to cultivate unconditional self-worth with Psychologist Adia Gooden by watching this video:

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (6)

12. He wants to see if you miss him

Why do men come back after no contact?

Some men come back to check if you miss them at all. The logic behind this is simple – your ex is surprised you can go that far without communication. So, his coming back is to see how you are living fine without him in your life.

13. He’s too lazy to date again

We all know that starting a new relationship demands a lot. You want to know this new person, their hobbies, likes, dislikes, strengths, and weaknesses, which takes nothing less than six months.

When your ex considers this, it may sound overwhelming to him. So, he believes it’s better to come back to you.

14. He’s not sure what’s out there

What goes through a guy’s mind during no contact? Your ex might be working with the phrase, “The enemy you know is better than the angel you just met.” All relationships have ups and downs, and your ex-lover might consider this fact.

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15. He’s jealous of your new lover

Men sometimes return to your life when they see you have a new lover. Unfortunately, they can’t stand another person enjoying the pleasure of dating you.

16. He has regained confidence

After some time apart, individuals may work on themselves, boosting their self-esteem and confidence. They might return to the relationship with a newfound belief in their ability to contribute positively.

17. There is unfinished business

Sometimes, men may feel that there are unresolved issues or unanswered questions from the previous relationship. They return to address these lingering concerns and seek closure.

18. He faces a lack of alternatives

After exploring other options, they might find that none are as compatible or fulfilling as the previous relationship. In such cases, returning can be a result of realizing your unique connection.

19. There’s clarity

The break allows men to gain clarity about their feelings and what they want from a relationship. They may return when they’re certain that you’re the person they want to be with.

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (7)

20. He has regret

Some men may leave a relationship hastily and later realize they made a mistake. Feelings of regret can prompt them to come back, hoping for a second chance.

21. You were his support system

If they’ve faced challenges or difficult times without your emotional support, they may realize the importance of your presence in their life and choose to return.

22. He has a desire for closure

In some cases, men come back to obtain closure. They may want to discuss the relationship, apologize for their behavior, or offer an explanation.

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (8)

23. Circ*mstances have changed

Life is dynamic, and circ*mstances can change. Perhaps a job loss, relocation, or other life events have led them back to the relationship, as the timing aligns more favorably now.

Commonly asked questions

The “no contact” rule is a powerful strategy for navigating complex relationship dynamics. Whether you’re trying to rekindle a connection or move forward, these answers provide insights to guide you through this process.

  • How long should I do no contact?

The duration varies, but typically it lasts around 30-60 days. This gives both you and your ex time to heal, reflect, and gain perspective on the relationship. It’s essential to use this time for self-improvement and personal growth.

  • What if I reach out to him during no contact?

It’s best to stick to the plan. Contact during this period can disrupt the healing and self-discovery process. The no-contact rule is most effective when both parties have space.

  • What if he doesn’t come back after no contact?

While it’s tough, don’t lose hope. The no-contact rule isn’t a guarantee of reconciliation. Focus on personal growth, self-love, and moving forward with your life, whether he returns or not.

  • What if he comes back but wants to be friends?

It’s okay to discuss your feelings and desires. Be honest about what you want from the relationship. If you’re open to friendship, make sure it aligns with your emotional well-being.

  • What if he comes back, but I don’t want to get back together with him?

Your feelings are valid. It’s crucial to express your emotions and have an open conversation. Decide what’s best for your future and be true to yourself.

Understanding the no contact rule

The no-contact rule is used for different reasons in a relationship. It could be to end a relationship or make someone miss you.

So, why do men come back after no contact? This article highlights that the no-contact rule works on men for different reasons. If you are still unsure why men come back after no contact, it is best to have fair communication or consult a relationship expert.

Why Do Men Come Back After No Contact: 23 Strong Reasons (2024)

FAQs

What makes a guy come back after no contact? ›

He misses you

Yes, they can. The male mind during no contact can divert them to feel your absence more strongly. People find their way back to their ex if they realize how much they miss her. This may happen if you spend a lot of time together during your dating phase.

What makes a man want to see you again? ›

If something really funny or memorable happened on your date, he may bring it up afterward as a way to break the ice or talk about how much fun you two had together. If he enjoyed being with you once, he likely wants to see you again.

What makes a man always come back? ›

He still loves you

Another reason related to “Why do men leave and come back?” is that they still love you. He may have ended your relationship and thought he would be able to move on, but this wasn't the case. Instead, he may have found that he misses you and loves you.

Why do men respond better to no contact? ›

The no contact rule male psychology forces him to recognize his loneliness. After a breakup, if you stop contacting him, he will feel free and enjoy this phase as much as he can.

Do men forget about you during no contact? ›

Frequently Asked Questions. Will my ex-boyfriend forget about me if I don't contact him? It's unlikely that an ex will forget about you, even if you don't communicate with them after the breakup.

How long does it take a guy to realize he wants you back? ›

On average, it takes men about 8 weeks to miss their ex after a breakup. This can vary depending on the length and intensity of the relationship. You can tell he misses you if he texts or calls frequently, talks to other people about you, and invites you out to do things with him.

Why does he keep coming back to you? ›

He may be giving you mixed signals because he's afraid of commitment or he doesn't know what he wants. It's possible that he's using you, either for sex, validation, or attention. If he's your ex, he may be trying to win you back. He could be toxic, controlling, or playing games with your feelings.

What keeps a man wanting you? ›

Keep flirting with him.

In fact, it's more important than ever to keep doing the cute, flirty things that got him interested. Playfully touch him on the arm, brush up against him while you're doing dishes together, or give him that look that lets him know you're thinking of more than just what movie to watch.

What makes a man wants you more? ›

A guy wants to feel like he's free to be himself, which requires some alone time. Respect that space by having your own interests and activities outside of him. Make it clear to him you have your own group of friends, hobbies, and interests. If he sees you're more independent, he's likely to want you more.

What kind of girl do guys regret losing? ›

The kind of girl guys regret losing is the self-assured girl. The self-assured girl is confident, independent, and knows her worth. She doesn't rely on others for validation and is secure in who she is. Guys regret losing her because she brings a sense of stability and strength to the relationship.

How to treat him when he comes back? ›

Letting him know that you understand his reasons for pulling away can make him feel more comfortable about reconnecting to you. Empathize with his struggles, but also be brief and to the point—you don't have to dismiss your own feelings of hurt. Say something like: “I totally get it—life happens.

What does he think when you don't contact him? ›

He'll wonder if you miss him at all.

He might even go so far as to think you're already seeing someone else if he can't get in touch or see you on social media. This is a very uncomfortable time for him. He's struggling to understand why you're not responding to his texts, or what you might be feeling in return.

Why is no contact so powerful? ›

While you inevitably will think of your ex-partner from time to time, eliminating contact and ceasing innocent “check-ins” can help reduce how much your mind wanders back to them and your relationship. It can also help prevent confusing feelings for both of you.

Do guys care if you don't reply? ›

Things You Should Know

He might not worry too much about not hearing from you—he might just think you are busy and will get back to him when you can. If you have a newer connection, or this behavior is new, he might think you are playing hard to get, texting another guy, or even ghosting him.

Is he also thinking about me? ›

Signs He Thinks about You

You can tell if a guy is thinking about you if he texts you good morning and good night, he sends you random short messages all day, he asks you a lot of questions about you, he likes and comments on your social media posts, or he messages you when he's hanging out with his friends.

How to respond when he comes back after no contact? ›

Empathize with his struggles, but also be brief and to the point—you don't have to dismiss your own feelings of hurt. Say something like: “I totally get it—life happens. I'm glad that we're back in touch.”

How long after no contact does a guy miss you? ›

If you two have been together for three months or less, he certainly could be missing you if you have only been in no contact for a few days. But it will likely take a few weeks or often more.

How do you know if a guy misses you after no contact? ›

17 signs your ex misses you during no-contact
  • He now spends excessive time online. ...
  • He tries “too hard” to flirt with other girls. ...
  • He's paying extra attention to his looks. ...
  • You feel strong energy around you. ...
  • You've been running into each other a lot. ...
  • You've stopped seeing him around.
Oct 30, 2023

How do you make him want you back after no contact? ›

You should strive to get more and more personal with them. If you are just emailing them immediately after no contact, you want to be texting them after a couple of weeks. If you have been texting for a few weeks, you should be trying to get on a phone call.

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